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Should Coaches (and Therapists) Who Have Depression and Anxiety Be Coaching Others?

by | May 2, 2015 | Blog Post | 0 comments

Today I am going to be discussing if coaches (and therapists) who have depression and anxiety be coaching others?

Few months ago, I read a story of a life coach, Emma Louise, who shared about her struggle with depression and anxiety.

 

In the comments section, I was surprised to see so many coaches applauding her for “coming out” and sharing their own depression stories, all while she continued coaching others.

 

Not a single person questioned her ability to coach while suffering from life altering anxiety and depression. In fact, there was a sense of great pride among the coaches who say that they suffer from severe depression and continue to coach. One of the arguments is that it helps them feel better. As you can imagine, this simply left me very disappointed. Who is supposed to help here?

 

I am writing today about this particular topic but this relates to any profession wherein people who are supposed to help us don’t take their own medicine.

 

This pertains to yoga instructors who are drunk, profane and don’t follow their own teachings (I go to yoga teachers for dharma and spiritual guidance and not just cool music with a set of poses).

 

This also goes to financial advisors who have no control over their own finances.

 

It also goes for those in law profession who tend to break the law for their own personal gain.

 

As you can imagine, I can go on and on.

 

Coaches who are being treated for anxiety or depression (i.e. taking brain altering meds or seeking other help because dis-ease affects their everyday life) should not be coaching.

 

Before I continue, let me share this: I cry, I experience fear, I have days where life doesn’t seem to have meaning and I have days when I do not act like the person I expect myself to be. In general, however, I feel like I was able to create the most ideal life and am able to coach from that perspective.

 

A financial advisor might go through financial trouble and manage to use that as a lesson for his/her clients and that is great! But what happens when there is no integrity in what they are selling?

 

Few years ago I met with a financial advisor.  He was telling me how much he hates doing financial advising while trying to sell me on his services. Needless to say, I never saw him again.

 

Coaches promise clients to help them create their most ideal life – is living with depression the most ideal life? I suspect not.

 

The comparison that comes to mind is an alcoholic leading an AA meeting: he may have a drink only once a week or every day, it is irrelevant: he hasn’t overcome. Recovering alcoholic is a great mentor though since they have been there and have found a way to overcome.

 

Most coaches promise clients inner peace, calm and happiness – how can they help them find that when they, themselves, haven’t found it? If you tell me that a coach with depression/anxiety is also happy and calm – then I am confused. Which is it?

 

Afraid of offending anyone, we preach acceptance and move into a state where anything goes. It feels to be very symptomatic of our society today. It frustrates me because we continue to lower the standards for our professions and not see a problem in that.

 

I do understand that it all depends on our perception of how a coach, a yoga teacher, or a financial advisor should behave.

 

I am wondering, though, if that has to do with our perception or making an excuse for our behaviors or those around us?

 

Do what you love and mean it. Do it with integrity. This is not only important because it is the right thing to do but do it for you. If you are guilty of saying one thing and behaving otherwise, it subconsciously affects how you see yourself. You may not think it’s a big deal, but over time – you will lose self-respect and self-love.

 

So, what do you think about coaches (or therapists) who suffer from severe depression or anxiety should be coaching?

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