Don’t die with your music in you: Share your gift

Today I want to talk about sharing your gift, whatever your gift may be.

So many of my friends and clients are visionaries and their gifts inspire me greatly. I look at what they have to offer and I think of how many people could benefit from it. The problem is that almost 99.9% of us talk ourselves out of an idea before we even make an attempt to make it a reality. Goes something like this:
ME: What do you really want to do? What are you born to do? What do you secretly do in your free time that you get so much joy from and could do your whole life?

YOU: Oh, I love to write (insert: teach, preach, paint, own my own company, etc). I want to inspire others through my writing (read: service, product, advice) and help them on their path. I really think that I can make a difference. Oh, if I could do that and make money doing what I love, I would be the happiest person on planet Earth. BUT that’s just a pipe dream…….there are so many writers (coaches, musicians, yoga teachers, etc) out there……what do I have to offer……it takes a long time to see financial gain…..it would take years to make it happen…..who would want to buy what I have to offer…..
The list goes on and on. Folks, if I got a dollar for every time I heard this – I would be a millionaire. This statement doesn’t make me happy. If anything, I keep thinking how many people are missing out on a gift that only YOU have been given. It is not yours but you have been given IT and have been chosen to share it with the world.

Greatest pitfall in not realizing your goals is talking yourself out of it as soon as the idea strikes.

They say that the wealthiest places on earth are cemeteries: businesses never started, books never written, inventions never discovered. One of the most common pitfalls when pursuing our passion is talking ourselves out of it before we even attempt it. One of my favorite teachers, Wayne Dyer, says: ‘don’t die with your music still in you’.
I am here to remind you that you are facing the same battle as everyone else on this earth: knowing that you are good enough, smart enough, worthy enough and funny enough.

Do you know that 9 out of 10 books never get finished? If you have attempted writing at some point, you will knowingly think of your manuscript that is still gathering dust. Why did you stop? More than likely, you told yourself that it was no good and who would want to read your stuff anyway. Am I right? Well, if every writer thought the same – we would miss out on some amazing reading.
I am talking about writing here, but insert any project that you have started and never finished only because you talked yourself out of the possibility of success/achievement/positive outcome before you even gave it a shot.

Personal story

I remember having this conversation with myself when I realized that I wanted to leave years of schooling and professional work to be a life coach. It went something like this:
“I am relatively young, how can I coach others when I haven’t achieved everything in my life? How can I charge for helping people? There are so many coaches already in my zip code and I have heard so many times how hard it is to find clients. I don’t want to have to sell myself. What if no one hires me? What if I don’t make enough money?
The list goes on and on and all of these arguments could have prevented me from even pursuing my passion. Luckily, I had a great coach who helped me identify that these thoughts were helpful as they were still questions that needed to be answered. She also taught me to always ask the following question “Is it true?”
The truth is that I don’t care about other coaches: I feel incredibly compelled to do this work and I come alive when I coach. In fact, I am very good at what I do and I am born to do this work. This is not a job I do because I need to make money. I do this because I feel exhiliarted doing it and it is something that I could do happily for the rest of my life and not feel like I am working.

This process wasn’t easy but it was a territory I needed to explore and address before I started my business. You have to do the same. Don’t just push out your negative thoughts – write them all down. Write every single argument for why you don’t think it’s a good idea (I am not smart enough, don’t have enough time/money, etc) and address that. Actually write it out.

Me becoming the female Tony Robbins

Here is another personal example. If you know me, you know that I want to be the female Tony Robbins. I have the energy, belief and confidence that I am born to do this work. I LOVE what I do and people around me know that I am 100 % real. BUT – I have those days (just like everyone else) when I look at the world and start something like this:
“I am already in my 30s and I feel like I should have started earlier. I just had a baby and simply don’t have as much time to develop my business. There are so many people out there already who are very good – can I actually do this? Am I as good as I think I am?”

I can chose to believe these thoughts and if I do, then my activity level for getting there will slow down and eventually stop. I actually have a choice here: believe these crazy thoughts that are not true or address them and use them as an argument for why I should pursue this. It would go something like this:
“At this age, I am much more focused and clear about what I want to do. I have the confidence and crystal clear vision, stable life so that I can pursue my goal. I love the fact that I am choosing to slow down now that I have a baby because I can use this time to work on myself more and write more. I may not do as many speaking gigs but hey – I can work on other things that are equally important. Yes, there are other people who are very talented but there is no one out there just like me. My entire life was designed it was because I am meant to do this and I have a different approach to doing this.”
See the difference? Folks, it is all about the story you tell yourself and what you start to believe. After all, say a lie five times and it becomes the truth. What you affirm over and over again becomes your reality.

Please don’t die with your music still in you. Whatever it is you desire to do, at least try pursuing it before you give up. And if the opportunity is long gone and you tell me that you didn’t want it anyway- I will know you are not being honest with yourself. Worse: you will know that yourself. It may not happen overnight but that’s not the point. The goal is to do what you love, be genuine and authentic, and use the talent you were given for the service of others.

Exercise to help you address what is standing in your way:

• • • Write what you want on top of the page.
    • Write what it would mean to get that.
    • Write all of the negative thoughts about why you don’t think you can have it
    • Then – address every single one of those points from a different (read: YES I CAN) perspective.
    • Put that list around the house and start reminding yourself why you CAN.